Adventures of a New Decade

I spent my big 30th birthday on a new adventure in the Northwest: Seattle and Portland, two cities to which I've never been but have always wanted to go. So me and my best buddy and brother Ben (that's a lot of alliteration) drove to Washington Wednesday after work and stayed the night in Kennewick, then went on to Seattle the next day (I was sleepless before I got to Seattle. Maybe I was nervous about entering the new decade the night before at 2:56am.)
The weather was a little cool in Seattle but it didn't rain on us. We took the monorail into the city. The conductor told us to sit by him but warned us there was no necking up front (yeah, we got a lot of those kinds of jokes. I guess siblings typically don't travel together.)
We hit Pike's Market first - a cool place by the water where they have all these shops and the workers still throw fish, though they didn't do it when we were there. One of them did throw a stuffed fish at a lady who then spilled her coffee in her hair. That was the only fish-throwing excitement we got. We ate salmon and prawn sandwiches at a little grill in the midst of it all and then walked to a Starbucks which are pretty much on every corner since it all started there and got the only thing we really could get (hot chocolate).

We also walked into the first Nordstrom's - also started there - and breezed through all the expensive things we couldn't afford. Really, we just wanted to get warm. Then we headed back to where we started. I guess you know you're getting old when you have to sit down and rest in the middle of the day and take an Alka Seltzer from all the fattening food you ate the day before. Ben bought all my favorite sugar-laden treats for my big day.
Before dinner we went to the EMP - Experience Music Project - which happened to be free that night and open later than usual. It's a big music museum by the space needle which has interactive exhibits that lets you try different instruments, tells you about different musicians like Jimmy Hendrix and Kurt Cobain - both from Seattle, and just has a cool design and huge guitar/instrument tree in the middle of the floor. Ben and I also got to have our own band for 5 minutes. They put you in this room set up like a rock concert - flashing lights, a big screen projecting an audience, and instruments you can play. They had us make up a band name (We chose Fire in the Hole) and then we picked a song and jammed out on stage as if we were in a band. It was so much fun and we really got into it - Ben on the drums and me on this sweet white electric guitar. We bought a poster of us playing after (it's touristy, but we had to) and they printed out concert stubs for us with our band name on them and "price of admission $60.00" If only...

We had to hurry but we made our expensive dinner reservation in the space needle. The restaurant actually rotates every 45 minutes so you get a view of the whole city. Lucky for us it was a very clear night and Seattle was beautiful. What a great birthday! We stayed with my Aunt Kristy in Montesano for the night and on Friday headed up the Olympic Peninsula and to the Rainforest in Olympic National Park.



I was so excited to go, especially since my children's novel is set in the jungle and we don't really have anything like that in America except for the area in Washington. It was so green and pretty. We took a walk in the Trail of Moss too which was almost surreal. Loved it! Since Forks (the Twilight town for those who possibly don't know that) was only about 10 minutes away from the Rainforest, I made Ben drive up there so I could just see it and let my imagination run wild for a bit. It was touristy but I enjoyed it and enjoyed seeing the little things the town had done for sightseers even though the movie wasn't actually filmed there and the book wasn't written with that specific town in mind.


Apparently, they just picked out spots that matched Stephenie Meyers' descriptions in the book and labeled them as the houses and spots of interest. I did buy a button that said "Only a Vampire Can Love you Forever." La Push, the beach on the Indian Reservation about 20 minutes away, was very pretty and a good spot for pictures. We had our lunch there before heading back to the Rainforest and then down the coast past Ruby Beach. I love seeing the forest and ocean on both sides of me. How amazing.


Saturday morning we drove down the coast across the Columbia bridge into Astoria and then made our way down to Portland - also a cool city. It was a bit rainy but not bad. We just happened to run into a Trader Joes and stocked up (man I wish they had those stores in Utah!) Then we went to NW 23rd avenue where my friend told me we would find some cool boutiques and cool atmosphere, which we did. The city has a charming style and authenticity I really liked. I like the feel of the Northwest.


The houses were cool too and colorful with a kind of old-fashioned charm. Ben noted after experiencing both cities that there weren't many redheads around (which is unfortunate) and actually not many blondes either or maybe they just don't succumb to bottled hair as much as they do in California and Utah. We stopped at Jake's Famous Crawfish for dinner. I love Happy Hour. I'm sure they hated us for not drinking alcohol and still getting insanely cheap, tasty food but I feel zero guilt. The other wino's will make up for it. We also went to Powell's bookstore - the biggest bookstore I've ever been in - and bought a few books. I think I would be there a lot if I lived in Portland. We drove to the Portland temple to see it at night before heading to my cousin's house for another free night's stay. I'm so thankful for family and friends. Our drive home on Sunday was along the Columbia River Gorge (which almost made up for the incredibly boring drive through Idaho). We stopped to see Multonomah Falls along the 84 highway, and even though the weather was a little snowy, the scenery was beautiful. I would love to go back in the late spring or summer.
The trip was the perfect length and I'm so glad I could go and go with my brother. It's great to get along with someone that well. I reflected on what I've been able to experience and achieve in my 20s which ended up being more than I thought after I wrote them down in my journal. I learned a lot in school and serving a mission, progressed from writing poems to an actual book (with some screenplays in between) and traveled to Europe. I also learned a lot about myself and people in general and how I want to be better. My hope for this new decade - my 30s - is to pass on those experiences and give back what I have learned and will continue to learn. It's harder for me now than it ever has been to see what may lie ahead, but as Meryl Streep said in Out of Africa, perhaps God made the world round so we couldn't see too far ahead. I'll buy that one for now. (That's a great movie by the way.)
So on to the new adventures that await and to embracing life, whatever it may bring and whatever you may work with it to bring. Of all the things I'm most grateful for, it is the relationships with others that bring me the most joy and meaning and I am ever so grateful for that.

Missing Hubcaps

I've had a missing hubcap for a couple of months now, which my dad frowns upon because he thinks it's white trash, but when I drove back to California a few weeks ago to work for a few days I noticed that most of the cars in LA have one hubcap missing probably from all the street parking so maybe I fit in there more than I thought.
I apologize for the gap in updating my blog. January is my least inspiring month and I haven't found much motivation in finding stuff to write about so I didn't. I will say I've been working on finishing the re-write of my children's book, tweaking my first album which I plan to have done by my birthday, looking at masters programs, reading Bonds That Make Us Free with some friends from work - very insightful about your way of being and how you interact with others, - and discovering Horatio Hornblower. I love the British. My mom's been recovering nicely from her surgery - still as fiesty as ever - and I think Ben and I solved the ant problem in our kitchen six ant traps later. I also got to experience the Sundance Film Festival for the first time this year. It was crowded but I saw a great film called Adam which was a surprisingly refreshing love story. I love well-written scripts and want to get better at writing them myself. My recent trip to California was productive. I taught in Compton and West LA, tried a great new Italian restaurant, ran on the beach twice (I love California weather, it makes me happy),went to Disneyland, spent time with my nieces and found some cheap stuff at the swap meet (and had a lovely nap after), and made the entire road trip by myself which I decided I don't want to do again. The drive's too long, I don't have cruise control, and I got tired of talking to myself - even in my different accents. But it did make me feel good that the gas station attendant in Baker wished me a good trip and sincerely asked me to drive safely. Wow, some stranger cared. I was genuinely touched. I drove back to Utah on Groundhog's Day and was so glad I didn't wake up to Sonny and Cher the next morning and have to repeat the drive over again. I'm also enjoying being a Relief Society teacher and gave my first lesson in my new ward on the same day Ben and I were asked to speak in Church. My brain felt kind of taxed but it was an edifying Sunday. I've been thinking a lot about balance lately and how balance is the key to everything. One can't be too extreme in one direction or the other but develop wise judgment and be responsible to exercise judgment in the variety of situations that we encounter, that our unique to us and to circumstances. I'm finding that things aren't always so black and white like Star Wars or Lord of the Rings (still my favorite movies). Life requires the constant examining and exercising of justice and mercy, of judgment between what is right and what is wrong for each of us in our different spheres. Of course there is a basic foundation and important, basic building blocks but the more I learn the more I realize how sparingly absolutes should be used and applied to ourselves and to others. Life is about balance. So maybe I should lose another hubcap just to make it even.

In the Bleak Midwinter - there is hope

Regardless of what Martha Stewart, Rachel Ray, and Oprah say, sometimes the best gifts at Christmas are the re-gifted ones. My family found out last Thursday, after my mom had to go to the emergency room in tremendous pain, that there was a large tumor growing inside her about the size of a large grapefruit. That emotionally charged and frightening word "cancer" has hung in the air all weekend, especially scary for my dad who is also sick with Parkinsons. Yesterday as I waited with my dad in the waiting room for my mom to come out of surgery, we talked about how different Christmas would be this year - not the same as the joyous Christmases of the past with our many family traditions. I knew it would be different this year, it's already passed me by a little and hasn't been as much in my heart as in times past. The challenges and experiences of this year have definitely weighed heavily upon my heart and now this one rejuvenating, merry holiday was marked by this dark cloud, this heavy sadness with the potential to usurp the joy of the season. But somehow, and to my amazement, I didn't feel what I thought I would. I just felt a pure and simple hope - not that nothing bad or sad would happen, but a hope that all potential sadness, loss, weakness, could be overcome and by that I mean Christ can make us better inside. He can truly heal us and strengthen us. Things we never thought we could do or endure are always possible with Him. I didn't expect to write all that in my blog but it just came out and even though I often struggle to believe that I pray everyday to believe that more and more. I felt that yesterday - the true gift of Christmas, and the gift of having the good news that my mother is well. The tumor was benign and the surgery was a success. The doctor came out and told us around 6:30pm. It is a great blessing and gift to have mom back, and to be reminded of the gift she is and the gift that family relationships truly are. All seven of us kids and my dad gathered around her bed last night as she came back from recovery and we said a family prayer together. How grateful I am for my family this Christmas and for the gifts the Savior gives that we don't always realize are gifts. I am grateful for that.

Now, to transition to a few of the things that have happened since I last wrote which was a long time ago cause I've been a slacker. I went to California a couple of weeks ago to sustain my complicated Catherine-like lifestyle. I flew back to substitute for one day so I keep my health beneftis and this time I went to teach in Compton. I didn't have my own car with me so I relied on the mercy of my uncle and a great friend in Huntington Beach to drive and pick me up. They both have pretty nice cars so I was a bit concerned for them but they thought I was worth the risk so I'm very grateful to them. I love the contrast between Salt Lake and LA. It's always good to be reminded what it feels like to be in the minority (not many pasty-white redheads around Compton).

I was also so hungry that day I actually broke down and bought school lunch. I know, I shocked even myself. I didn't even eat school lunch when I was in school, especially not tater-tots, but it gave me enough energy to finish out the day reading the Crucible with the the juniors and seniors. I also made a trip to Disneyland while I was there and had two glorious runs on the beach wearing shorts and a tank-top. Such a far cry from my running in Utah - fleece pants, three shirts, and a headband, and worse I haven't been able to get up in the morning and go like I usually do. Something about the complete darkness, freezing temperatures, and slippery roads that discourages me a little. I don't know, maybe it's just me. I also took a shopping trip to my favorite store in the world Trader Joes and got some Peppermint Joe Joe's dipped in chocolate. What a good trip. Still loving my roommate, my guitar time, and have a bunch of movies and books I'm looking forward to devouring this holiday break. Thought I've also got a lot of writing to do so we'll see how much I get done. Life...life is quite an amazing journey. Happy Christmas everyone (I like the way the British say it) and God bless us everyone.

D.I. Details

I recently completed perhaps my greatest acting feat to date in one of the most challenging roles I've ever taken on - an employee at Deseret Industries. I like to think my character Margaret is based on the crazy part of myself that only comes out when I'm talking to myself in the shower...or in the car, especially at night when I think nobody can see me. Margaret is a spazzy, distracted, tangent-centered worker who puts chocolate candy bars in her pocket until they melt and then offers them to her supervisors (I added that little detail myself). A couple of producer assistants and I were helping with job coach training for the DI supervisors and managers who came from Washington, California, Arizona, etc... It was actually a lot of fun and it was a nice change of pace to wear ripped jeans and over-sized sweatshirts to work instead of nylons and skirts. I'm considering adopting the character of Margaret permanently after a number of the employees in training asked if I (Catherine Cook) was anything like my character cause they'd love to hang out with Margaret and go with her on some of her tangents. Hmm...I'll have to consider that, though most of my tangents take place inside my own mind reminding me of the line in Brandi Carlile's song "all of my friends who think that I'm blessed, they don't know my head is a mess..." That's definitely me!
Still loving Millcreek though the fall leaves are just about gone and now my legs turn pink when I run cause it's getting cold. My brother keeps telling me to buy running tights but I like to think I'm still in California. Speaking of running, I actually came in as the 2nd place girl in a 5K at Sugarhouse Park yesterday and to be honest I wasn't really even trying to win. It made me feel kind of good, like I'd accomplished something (as if being DI Margaret wasn't enough.) I've been wondering why I never took track in highschool. How fast would I have been 10 years ago. I'm such a late bloomer. I've also been thinking about heart disease lately - a different kind than the cholesterol one. Here it is: When you get involved with people that have messed up hearts they invariably mess up yours too. I think it's contagious. So then when you start dating someone else your messed up heart then probably messes up theirs. It's a horrible cycle and incredibly unfair. Forget STDs, how about ETDs - emotionally transmitted diseases. Stop the madness. Please straighten out your own heart before you try and win someone else's, including mine. Excited for Thanksgiving and Christmas and yes I will be going to see Twilight when it opens this Friday (though not the midnight showing. I don't want to fall asleep on Edward.)

Millcreek Mecca

So I've made the foot of Millcreek canyon my mecca for the rest of 2008 with one of the best and cleanest roommates I've ever had - my brother. Yes we do get the occasional 'are you married or are you brother and sister' question to which we respond yes. We got a lot of furniture from family and friends and it's pretty dang nice too. Maybe I should have just done that in the first place instead of scavenging for free furniture in the alleyways (Naa). I still miss that big gold frame in my old yellow-walled LA apartment. I'll toast to those good memories in my new set of IKEA wine glasses, or I should say pomegranate juice glasses. The best part of where I live now is that Millcreek Canyon is a run away - granted a long run but do-able. I did it today. The fall leaves are absolutely magical and inspiring - and if you know me then you know when I say magical I mean it. I go up there with my running shoes and ipod and just let go of everything and let in the wonders of the moment and being alive. It absolutely invigorates me and in a way fills in for the ocean I left behind. Like most things I know the autumn colors won't last much longer so I'm enjoying every leaf of it while I can. I'm really enjoying work in spite of having to wear nylons, and the people we work with. We started a weekly lunch club and get together to discuss everything from Kierkegaard to Arrested Development. I'd like the lunches to be European style - 2-3 hours - but I guess I'll settle for the American way. We'll just talk faster. We went to our new singles ward this past Sunday. The RS President had us say our ages in the new member meeting (not appreciated) but I feel no shame in who I am and where I'm at - in some ways I'm better than I've ever been - so I said my real age. They "consoled" me by telling me not to worry, there are a few other members older than me. Thanks so much. I guess I can be the old lady in the ward. I do have a rocking chair in my room. My dad didn't want it to go to waste and actually I like it. So even though the average age is about 21 (can barely believe it) I'm sure I'll enjoy it and it helps that the bishopric and ward members are really friendly. I'm still looking at grad school as a possibility. My old professors at the U of U actually remember me or at least that my hair looks different. One even had an old paper of mine in his stack of "A" papers. That made me feel kind of good. I'm also still working on my book and plan to finish by the end of the year. It's one of the endeavors I feel my heart the most in right now and I need that.
I also want to take this opportunity to say how much I love the DI. We've found some great things and it's good to be able to toast bread again. Sometimes I don't know how it happens but I'm feeling very hopeful and can say life is good. Milton said each of us is a ruler of our kingdom. In the last year I've learned more and more to compare less and less and simply do my best to rule this sometimes complicated but fascinating kingdom that is me.
I will miss my favorite month of October but look forward to what lies ahead.

October Rush

My favorite month is here and one good thing about being in Utah is I get to actually enjoy autumn and all the beautiful colors - that is if the snow doesn't ruin it all first. The makeup lady at Macy's once told me my coloring was "Autumn Harmony" so maybe my liking for the season is something genetic. I just got back from another visit to California where, in my crazy life, I had to drive to get a smog test to keep my car registered in California and I had to substitute teach two days so I can keep my great benefits for two more months (I'm keeping my options open). It's inspiring teaching kids who would rather put on three layers of makeup in class than actually learn about great American Literature. When asked about his plans for the future one 10th grade boy responded that he was just going to sell drugs. Wow, I miss subbing.
I saw a great play in Burbank on my trip too called R.R.R.E.D. - The Redhead Musical Manifesto. It was hilarious and it validated my redheaded trials and challenges including the obscene name calling in grade school. I'm still scarred. The show was based on the Oxford Study that redheads will become extinct in 2100 - perish the thought. Apparently all of us redheads have to do our part to make sure that doesn't happen (I won't say what that is here).
My redheaded brother Ben joined me for the weekend and we hung out with my old roommate Marcella and went to Griffith Observatory - something I'd never done in my 3years in LA - and also went to Canter's Jewish Deli, open 24 hours. It almost felt like I was in NY again minus the rude (yet strangely endearing) service. It was so fun to see old friends and all the people I love and miss in LA and Orange County. Of course we went to Disneyland too which was decorated for Halloween - gosh I love pumpkins! I also got to meet with Kamaria, my mentee for WriteGirl, and we did some writing together at Borders. All in all, it was a pretty productive trip and I'm missing California and the ocean again already - especially as it gets colder here.

So I guess it's back to work tomorrow in my nylons and skirt, working for the Man. There are some good things, though. I have rediscovered Ding Dongs while working at the COB - Church Office Building. My brother says I'm just another kernel on the COB. May I be the best kernel I can be.

Cravings

I guess it's about time for an update on my uncertain life. First and most important, I had my first candy corn craving a few weeks ago which means fall is in the air. Good things always happen for me in the fall even if they fall apart in the Spring (but I'm hoping that won't happen this time.) I've been working as a producer's assistant for the past month at the Church Office Building where I'm quite literally working for the Man. The adjustment to an office job again hasn't been easy and to make it even more of a challenge I have to wear nylons everyday (most people don't even know what those are anymore) and there's no caffeine on the premises which has been tough for my recent caffeine cravings. Smuggling in is an option, however. Many do it. I'm enjoying the work though, and I get to do writing and some work with media so it's going really well right now.

I've also been working on recording my first album - yeah okay so I'm a total amateur and I haven't even been playing the guitar for a year yet but it's been fun and really good for me and I'm learning a lot. The lead guitarist of the band "The Craving" (they have a great sound by the way) has generously and patiently been helping me produce my five songs. The album should be out out by Christmas. (It just sounds cool to say that.) I've also been thinking about going back to school next fall for a Master's degree. I'm looking at English programs and also went down to BYU (they also have no caffeine on the premises - unbelievable) and got some information on their program in social work. I'd have to sign up for classes now to be eligible to apply in January so that's pretty much out for now. And as much as I love English and literature I'm not sure I really want to be an academic and deconstruct for the rest of my life. I love learning and I'm a pretty driven person but I'm just not sure grad school is the way for me. I'm keeping my options open though. My twin nieces are here from California so the whole family's been able to get together and that's been great too. I'm so grateful for family. I really miss California but I've been trying to enjoy Utah. I went to the State Fair last week, went to a rodeo last night (and learned how they get the horses and bulls to buck - poor guys) and went rock climbing yesterday afternoon in Big Cottonwood Canyon. It was only my second time climbing but we did this really high 3-pitch climb and after I did it I was really amazed that I could. It built up my confidence and courage. I think there really is a tie between physical challenges and emotional or spiritual challenges. It felt really good to conquer some fears, or at least contend with them.