Spring Break

I don't know many other people who go to a cold place for springbreak but I did (I guess I've always liked nonconformity, which is why I came to Utah - hehehe.) Last week was actually springbreak from school and since my brother comes home from his mission in Norway this Thursday I thought I'd make springbreak 2 weeks (that's the joy of freelance work. I get to be gone til the end of March.) There was snow when I first got here but the weather's better now. I even got to wear sandals yesterday. It's actually been really good for me to be home, get some free and loving therapy and re-examine the reasons I need it in the first place. I saw the first premiere of the new Emma Smith movie and personally found it a deeply moving and insightful film. She was an amazing woman. I also went snow-shoeing for the first time, have been practicing my latent basketball skills with my youngest brother (who not surprisingly is quite a bit taller than me now), and I've eaten chocolate everyday. I've also laughed more than I have in a while. Ben and I have been listening to Brandi Carlile again, trading itunes music, and practicing guitar. I'm so excited to get my own when I get back to LA. We also updated our resumes so we can get "real" jobs (as my father would say), and have started working on our next film gig. Life is a rare and complicated gift but a gift nonetheless and I'm grateful for all it is teaching me although sometimes I am an unruly and impatient student but there is hope. I am also one who is open to change.

Shuffle

I've been thinking about life lately in terms of an ipod (since I've been listening to it so much lately on my sunny afternoon walks). I think sometimes your life is just on shuffle and that's okay. Sure it's good to have a playlist - a plan of what you want and where you're going with it (I come from a hyper-planning, stability-driven family) but that's not always how life works. Sometimes you just don't know what it is you want until it comes up on its own and then you say "aha" that's what I wanted and I didn't even know it. Hence the value of shuffle, even in life. Sometimes you've just got to do the shuffle. So that's my wisdom this week.
So now that I'm 29 it's not as bad as I thought (I can't let it be.) I'm still shorter than all the kids at school am sometimes mistaken for a student, especially when I bring a backpack with me, so at least I don't look that old. In the Los Angeles school district this last week one class thought I was an alien because of my freaky double-jointed arm, two kids thought I was Jodie Foster in the movie Sommersby, and another kid said his dream was to be a right bench warmer in the NBA (hmm...are kids getting more realistic or just forgetting to dream?) I also lost my temper on Friday after two long days of teaching six classes of disrespectful (and that's actually a euphemism)kids at school who wouldn't listen to a thing I said. Two kids kept laughing as I yelled cause they'd never seen me angry. That made me even angrier and then they said they wanted the old Ms. Cook back. Needless to say it was a tough day. By the end of the period one of the kids asked if I was going to cry. Yeah, but on my way home.
To end on a positive note, one of the highlights of my week was finally seeing the musical "Wicked" which I loved. I'm not a ridiculously over-the-top musical fan but this one had a great story to go along with the stimulating visual sets, music, and costumes that characterize musicals. This story had a lot of heart and depth of meaning and to me that makes all the difference. I liked it so much I even put the some of the songs on my ipod. Hmm...